“Simplicity is the ultimate sophistication.” ~ Leonardo da Vinci
In 1995 after establishing a successful residential construction company with my then husband, I found that although we were doing well financially – I was crashing. Or as a good friend of mine said, “I don’t really know what a nervous breakdown is, but if you’re not in one, you’re very close.” I had everything that was supposed to make me happy. The big beautiful home, cars, vacations, but something was faulty. After all of the new home building I had contracted in the outside world, something monumental was building inside of me.
Something wasn’t right. It was time for a renovation, and for those of you have been through one, you know just how one thing leads to the next!
I felt emotionally reckless. I had never taken the time to architect my own identity, build an internal foundation, and my soul was crying out for help. My early life was spent running from myself and I did a fairly good job of it up to this point. Nonetheless, I let my exterior consume me and it was time to take control of my life.
The people around me were devastated. They thought I was mad. How could I blame them for being confused and angry? I was living a charade.
The years that followed were challenging and my marriage ended as a result. They were the most difficult years of my life. I spent time developing the foundation of my identity and did a lot of “letting go”.
I thought I was a good enough parent, yet, with the transition of the divorce, I felt incompetent. I knew I had to pull myself together. I searched, I worked, I grew out of it…and through it all came the concept of the “Me + U” Interactive Journals. And I realized that sometimes we have to lose ourselves to really find out who we are and what we are made of.
We all know change is inevitable, but the process of it – not always so fun. It took some time, but now, as I look around my place, everything has meaning and is purposeful, just as we are created to be. Finally! I know who I am and it is reflected in my home.
My space feels sacred to me...
Pictures of my family in happy times surround me, the view of the ocean from my living and bedroom soothes my watery, Scorpio Moon. The mandala paintings I made adorn my wall to remind me to take time to center. The books on my shelf reflect my Sagittarius House of home, and keep me asking the questions, “Who am I?” and “What am I here to contribute?” I’ve brought my love of nature indoors with plants and natural elements such as sea shells, of course – it’s a Libra/Venus thing.
Of all the modalities I experienced in coming home to my authentic self, it was astrology that assisted me in seeing myself more objectively. It helped me to accept myself for who I am, and presented the potential for growth and positive change. It has benefited me through conscious thought, in recognizing what supports me in my metaphysical and physical environments .
It continues to help me to be a better person.
I am not suggesting there is something wrong with material things. I am a lover of comfort and beauty. I only ask you to question, do the things around you have meaning? Take a look around your home and office. Do an intuitive inventory to see what really matters to you. Take a few good deep breaths, listen, and clear the clutter from your mind and space, and recognize there is a freedom in having less to take care of, worry about, or clean.
When we live with less, we really do have so much more.
©2017 Cathi Curen