The Stories We Tell Ourselves
"There is no greater agony than bearing an untold story inside you." ~Maya Angelou
I started my coaching practice with a focus on parenting because it was what I struggled with, you know the saying, "We teach what we need to learn the most." As I learned new ways of being and doing, it was natural for me to want to share as I was re-writing my own story. To assist and ease the emotional pain that often goes with the parenting process - to help change family histories and some of the ineffective practices that we often pass down from generation to generation. The stories we keep telling ourselves…
Our stories are significant in how we play out our lives. I value the power of story so much that the tag line I began with years ago still remains the same on the “Me + U” Journal Series page, and reads, “Like an open ended book we write our own stories in life and as parents and mentors the characters we help to develop are those of our children.”...Of course, we may never know where our stories will take us or how they will influence others, but the possibilities are truly endless!
We speak to each other in story. We tell stories about where we came from, our families, and where we’ve been, stories of joy, happiness and hardship. But the saddest stories are often the ones we tell ourselves. The myths that hold us back.
The great discovery however, is that although we can’t erase what has already been written, we can certainly pick up the pen and write a new chapter. And the beauty is that we can tame the beasts in our never ending story, filling it full of new characters and choices if we so desire.
Albert Einstein said, “The world as we have created it is a process of our thinking. It cannot be changed without changing our thinking.” Change is a bit scary though, isn’t it? It’s uncomfortable to charter into new waters, but it can also be an empowering and exciting adventure if we travel with the right guides.
What part of the old story do you want to complete to open up to the newer you? If you’re feeling really stuck, seek some help. A therapist or coach can be just what we need to support us during times of change. Astrology is also a great tool for this purpose. It has been around for over 3000 years and is said to be the sister of psychology. If we want to live our stories with more wholeness, it requires we formulate a relationship with the mysterious center within.
Our natal chart is telling of the beginning of our story and can bring insight to otherwise unnoticed themes and core issues that challenge us throughout our lives. It can "shine light" on things formerly unseen. In addition, as we go through the stages of life, a transit chart can provide affirmation and relief.
Therefore, If you have writer’s block keep taking the steps forward, and little by little the words will come, the people will show up, and life will take on a whole new meaning. But seriously, there is no shame in seeking a travel partner. Investing in help now can save time and money going forward.
In the meantime, here are a few ways to get started on your own. Simple steps to begin the transition into the new role you want to play in your life. Simple of course does not equate to easy, each of these three steps will require time and thought on your part. So here we go, let’s get started!
What is the story you are telling yourself? Is it yours or someone else’s?
Relationships are the cornerstone for a healthy lifestyle. However, when the lives we are living are a result of the influences or dreams of others, it’s time to reflect back onto the blank page. When we find ourselves at the crossroad, we must be willing to give up the old self to have the life we have been destined and dreaming for. Setting ourselves free from the confines of our minds and the thoughts of what we should be, to live from our authentic center. It is a continuous process of awareness and hard work. The reading of a new script to those who can support your new role.
If you could change your story, what would you like it to be?
As we begin to remember more of who we are through the cycles of life, it’s beneficial to begin a journal practice as a tool for self-inquiry, clarity, and self-understanding. By doing so one is able to differentiate themselves from any fictional story they have been living in. This is especially important if past chapters are emotional ones. No editing here, just honest writing. It turns out we can relieve ourselves of emotional discomfort by just taking twenty minutes a day to ink the page with thoughts and feelings.
Through the movement of the pen we can rediscover our purpose with a new appreciation for all of the unique parts of ourselves. By keeping an account of dreams, life synchronicity, and developing the habit of daily gratitude, a new story begins to surface.This integration becomes a platform to live with more love and compassion for all beings, especially one's self, creating deeper, more fulfilling relationships. It sets in place the re-wiring which creates a current, igniting inspiration for more supportive spaces from the inside out.
With all of the changes going on within and around us during this time of transition, maybe it’s time to write a new life chapter. Time to appreciate our unique talents and the freedom of living an authentic life. To live the role we are meant to play. Today I am making a conscious choice to live my life out in all of its fullness, not just fill my life full... I hope you’ll join me!
Is it time to create a new chapter in your life?
© Cathi Curen 2017